comic strip
Hello. If you're looking at this ol' blog, why not check out my new comic strip. It is called Back to School, and it is a laugh.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
not this again...
OK, I don't want to dredge up this old argument again... really, I don't.
But in honor of its one-year anniversary, I'd just like to say that Patrick Moore, co-founder of Greenpeace, agrees with me.
That is all.
But in honor of its one-year anniversary, I'd just like to say that Patrick Moore, co-founder of Greenpeace, agrees with me.
That is all.
Monday, April 03, 2006
this just in...
The US isn't happy with its record-breaking level of deficit spending. Apparently, waging one vaguely defined and largely unwinnable war simply isn't destroying the country's economy fast enough. Not to worry: the Pentagon has come up with another one! Beginning in 2006, Congress has earmarked additional spending to wage war on the internet.
Among their stated goals (and I'm not exaggerating) is to be able to completely control what information gets to both foreign countries and their own citizens, and the ability to "completely dominate the earth's electromagnetic spectrum". So, the US is actively developing ways to quash free speech and journalism, and as a backup plan they're figuring out how to just turn off all of those annoying "people" telling "the truth".
Am I surprised? Nope. Seems about par for the course.
Among their stated goals (and I'm not exaggerating) is to be able to completely control what information gets to both foreign countries and their own citizens, and the ability to "completely dominate the earth's electromagnetic spectrum". So, the US is actively developing ways to quash free speech and journalism, and as a backup plan they're figuring out how to just turn off all of those annoying "people" telling "the truth".
Am I surprised? Nope. Seems about par for the course.
Saturday, April 01, 2006
discuss...
I have been informed that my use of the term " 'net " is incorrect and annoying. The apostrophe, I am told, is unnecessary since "net" is a word on its own.
My position is that a "net" is something to catch fish, while the " 'net" is where this webpage lives. We don't like to say three-syllable words when one will do, so we say "the 'net". And like any speech contraction, an apostrophe should be added to denote the abbreviation.
Am I crazy? Or just plain wrong? It's a given that I'm anal.
Discuss...
My position is that a "net" is something to catch fish, while the " 'net" is where this webpage lives. We don't like to say three-syllable words when one will do, so we say "the 'net". And like any speech contraction, an apostrophe should be added to denote the abbreviation.
Am I crazy? Or just plain wrong? It's a given that I'm anal.
Discuss...
the internet is the new tv
I stumbled across this series of articles about the future of television programming and the adoption of the internet as a distribution medium.
The potential of the 'net is to cut out the middlemen. By virtually eliminating distribution costs, the internet replaces conventional broadcast networks, allowing content producers to provide their programming directly to consumers. The problem is that people don't expect to pay for television programming - sure, we pay $29.95 a month for our deluxe cable package, but that's just for access. The lion's share of programming costs are covered by advertisers. So how do the people making the content get paid? This article is one of the first I've seen that doesn't include the "1. do stuff, 2. use the internet, 3. ???, 4. profit" business model, but actually proposes something valid.
I agree that the 'net is a better distribution method than TV. I get what I want to see, when I want to see it, without needing to worry about forgetting to record a show. But perhaps it's a case of preaching to the choir. I am the guy who has cable TV included in his rent, and the first thing I did on moving in was get cable internet, disconnect the TV and shove it into a corner facing the wall, and set up my computer desk where it used to be.
Go figure.
The potential of the 'net is to cut out the middlemen. By virtually eliminating distribution costs, the internet replaces conventional broadcast networks, allowing content producers to provide their programming directly to consumers. The problem is that people don't expect to pay for television programming - sure, we pay $29.95 a month for our deluxe cable package, but that's just for access. The lion's share of programming costs are covered by advertisers. So how do the people making the content get paid? This article is one of the first I've seen that doesn't include the "1. do stuff, 2. use the internet, 3. ???, 4. profit" business model, but actually proposes something valid.
I agree that the 'net is a better distribution method than TV. I get what I want to see, when I want to see it, without needing to worry about forgetting to record a show. But perhaps it's a case of preaching to the choir. I am the guy who has cable TV included in his rent, and the first thing I did on moving in was get cable internet, disconnect the TV and shove it into a corner facing the wall, and set up my computer desk where it used to be.
Go figure.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
it's not so
I'm coming out of my own unannounced, perpetual semi-retirement to mention the funniest short I've seen. It's inane. It's juvenile. The main character's only features are his age and his accent. It will not teach you anything useful, and has been decried by several of my friends as a waste of 7 minutes of your life. And I think it's hilarious. So go watch it.
retirement
Hello the Internet,
I am officially retiring for a while; actually, I retired a few weeks back, I just didn't tell anyone. I will come back if:
(a) the Internet stops being boring and geeky all the time;
(b) the word "blog" ceases to exist, or they stop giving awards to blogs and calling them "the bloggies";
or (c) everyone stops using the word "zen" to refer to something other than zen buddhism.
These are my demands. If they are not met, be prepared to face the consequences: me not writing on this website anymore. You've been warned.
With a love that will echo through the ages,
Chris
I am officially retiring for a while; actually, I retired a few weeks back, I just didn't tell anyone. I will come back if:
(a) the Internet stops being boring and geeky all the time;
(b) the word "blog" ceases to exist, or they stop giving awards to blogs and calling them "the bloggies";
or (c) everyone stops using the word "zen" to refer to something other than zen buddhism.
These are my demands. If they are not met, be prepared to face the consequences: me not writing on this website anymore. You've been warned.
With a love that will echo through the ages,
Chris
Saturday, March 11, 2006
it came from outer space
NASA has been a busy bee lately. The Cassini probe has found liquid water on Enceladus, one of Saturn's moons. That's pretty huge, since where there's water there tends to be, well, life.
The Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter has successfully entered martian orbit! The satellite carries the most powerful science payload ever sent to another planet, and is capable of taking surface photographs with 1m resolution and using radar to probe for water up to a kilometer deep. Let's hope the little green men aren't 0.9m tall and living in caves two kilometers deep.
A couple weeks ago, NASA announced its budget for '07. It includes additional funding to cover cost overruns on the space shuttle and international space station - money that comes at the expense of science programs like the Hubble servicing mission and probes to further explore the solar system. It's not possible for NASA to do all of these things at once because Congress has frozen its budget to a measly 3% increase over last year's $16.4 billion - not enough to keep pace with inflation. Sure, $16B sounds like a lot of scratch. Until you remember that Bush is currently requesting another $65 billion to fund the war in Iraq, which will bring the total well over $400 billion. Oh, did I mention that the two missions mentioned above were approved and funded long before the war began? Enough said.
The Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter has successfully entered martian orbit! The satellite carries the most powerful science payload ever sent to another planet, and is capable of taking surface photographs with 1m resolution and using radar to probe for water up to a kilometer deep. Let's hope the little green men aren't 0.9m tall and living in caves two kilometers deep.
A couple weeks ago, NASA announced its budget for '07. It includes additional funding to cover cost overruns on the space shuttle and international space station - money that comes at the expense of science programs like the Hubble servicing mission and probes to further explore the solar system. It's not possible for NASA to do all of these things at once because Congress has frozen its budget to a measly 3% increase over last year's $16.4 billion - not enough to keep pace with inflation. Sure, $16B sounds like a lot of scratch. Until you remember that Bush is currently requesting another $65 billion to fund the war in Iraq, which will bring the total well over $400 billion. Oh, did I mention that the two missions mentioned above were approved and funded long before the war began? Enough said.
Thursday, March 09, 2006
bouncing balls
Friend and fellow would-be physicist Liz points us at this Bravia commercial which you may very well have already seen: balls bouncing down a San Francisco street. It's even more fun to watch knowing that it's all completely real - not done on computers. Just sit back and feel your mind comfortably melting.
Friday, March 03, 2006
dan kennedy solves your problems with paper, and other pieces
Timothy McSweeney's Internet Tendency is sometimes very funny, but that's usually when Dan Kennedy has written something. Rather than searching through their archives for his name, here's an index of everything he's ever written for the site. Or, if you only have a few seconds, read some of their lists.
juggling vs the beatles
Yesterday Jared posted a video about curling. Today I'm posting one about juggling. Maybe we should change our name from "Small Flightless Bird" to "YouTube Videos of Nerdy Non-Sports". Anyway, enjoy!
Thursday, March 02, 2006
warbears
Monday, February 27, 2006
don't mess with boing boing
We here at SFB link to (or steal links from) Boing Boing often, and for good reason. It's probably the most well-read blog out there, and it tends to act as a pretty entertaining filter for all the ways to waste your time on the internet - an accomplishment I've tried in my own small way to mimic with this site. Its power is tremendous - if they post a link to something, that link will probably show up on a few thousand other blogs within hours. And getting Boing Boing to link to your site (an event significant enough to warrant the creation of term "boingboinged"), is often enough to crash servers.
But the contributors tend not to put their awesome powers to direct use - at most, they'll just direct your attention to whatever they think deserves it, or post an editorial on some subject or another. That's why the actions they're taking against an American company that provides internet content-filtering software to other countries might be fun to watch: all four contributors are ganging together with the stated goal of putting the company out of business.
The reason? Thanks to Secure Computing's SmartFilter software, internet users in various parts of the world (including the United Arab Emirates, Qatar, and some parts of Africa) can't access Boing Boing due to bogus "nudity" false-positives.
Whether or not you're a regular reader, this fight should be fun to watch. Link.
But the contributors tend not to put their awesome powers to direct use - at most, they'll just direct your attention to whatever they think deserves it, or post an editorial on some subject or another. That's why the actions they're taking against an American company that provides internet content-filtering software to other countries might be fun to watch: all four contributors are ganging together with the stated goal of putting the company out of business.
The reason? Thanks to Secure Computing's SmartFilter software, internet users in various parts of the world (including the United Arab Emirates, Qatar, and some parts of Africa) can't access Boing Boing due to bogus "nudity" false-positives.
Whether or not you're a regular reader, this fight should be fun to watch. Link.
Sunday, February 26, 2006
Thursday, February 23, 2006
apologia
Through a series of hilarious yet unsettling events, the post below is only now visible by you, the reader. You had no idea SFB was on holidays. You dutifully visited each day as we tooled around Southeastern Ontario. We are dreadfully sorry and we promise that it will probably happen again.
Monday, February 20, 2006
hi-freakin-atus
SFB (or at least its principle contributor) is going on a road trip. Please join us again Thursday for the first episode of our four-part expose on the breakfast cereal industry, entitled "Corruption, Greed, and Ruthlessness: Peddling Sugar Highs".
Saturday, February 18, 2006
i woke up and my pillow was missing and stephen harper was still prime minister
In Canadian government news:
- Stockwell Day proposes national ID card - This is a pretty horrible idea. He even references the UK's national ID cards, which have been very unpopular (see Boing Boing's coverage for details), as his inspiration.
- Harper chooses Iraq war fan as US ambassador - Michael Wilson said in 2003 that Canada should have sent ships and aircraft to help with the invasion.
little people on food
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
daily show on cheney rampage
The Daily Show went nuts with the Cheney-hunting-accident story last night, and it was pretty hilarious. You can watch most of the show on the Comedy Central website in short streaming segments (1, 2, 3), or search around for torrents.
Thursday, February 09, 2006
four riddles - now with answers!
You've probably heard at least some of these before, but I felt like posting them anyway, and we all need a break from the usual politics and videos. These are four of my favourite riddles, mostly because none of them are trick questions. Feel free to email us for hints or answers, and why not leave your favourite riddle(s) in the comments?
1. You have eight blocks; they are completely indistinguishable from each other, but one is slightly heavier than the others. You are also given a balance. How do you find the heavy block using the balance only twice?
2. A castle is surrounded by a moat, as shown in the image. You are given two thick boards, four meters long and about a foot wide. How do you get across to the treasure in the castle? (You can't just float on the boards because the moat is filled with huge sharks, like bigger than the one in Jaws.)
3. You come to a fork in the road. One way leads to certain death, the other leads to the next village. Two twins are standing nearby. You've been told that everything one says is a lie, and everything the other says is the truth. You can ask only one question; both twins will answer. What do you ask them to figure out which path to take?
4. You are alone on the ground floor of a house. Upstairs there are three lightbulbs, but you can't see them (or their light) from where you are. The switches for the bulbs are downstairs and unlabelled. If you can only go upstairs once, how can you figure out which switch turns on which bulb?
Click here for answers.
